10,000 Reasons

I found this quote the other day in a journal which my friend gave me for the trip:

“Around me when I look, His handiwork I see;

This world is like a picture book to teach His love to me.” –Jane E. Leeson

I honestly just can’t even fathom that I’m here sometimes. I found myself walking along the beach after a meeting and had this enormous urge to just go sit on the beach and watch as the sun started to set. I probably sat there for 20-25 minutes just trying to etch every detail into my brain and wrap my head around the fact that I’m here. Sitting on the beach on the French Riviera. Me, Amanda Marcus. This 19 year old girl from Long Beach, California. And in all honesty this is where, in trying to express my thoughts and feelings around all that I just become speechless.

I just was sitting there. Content. Thankful. Amazed. Dumbfounded. A little chilly. With the prettiest blue water in front of me. Probably one of the most spectacular views I’ve seen—something people see in magazines and pictures—that few people will ever get to experience in their lives. Something that only I will ever get to experience in the same way, with the same mindset and place in my life that I just did.

And all these things are adding up in my brain and I just keep asking, what in the world could I possibly have ever done that I’ve been so blessed? Really, though. I try very hard—to be kind, to be loving, to be an example, to be a “good” person. But I’ve messed up. I’ve fallen many a times. I am nowhere near perfect nor will I ever be. And yet, “Around me when I look, His handiwork I see.” Everywhere. Everywhere I looked in that moment—the millions of grains of sand, the Lord-knows-how-many molecules of water making up the sea in front of me—I just see God. Carefully designing all of these little things (and I’m sure having a blast doing it). But why? And why am I lucky enough to experience all this?

“This world is like a picture book to teach His love to me.” Wow. Well that’s got to be it.

And all I can do at that point is pray. And be thankful. Because when I ask myself that question, I just feel peace and imagine God laughing to himself and telling me, “You didn’t do anything. In fact, you didn’t need to do anything to deserve to be here. You deserve it simply because you’re you. You’re Amanda. You’re one of many of my daughters, and I love you. So enjoy.”

So I continued to sit. I listened to a few worship songs. I tried to continue to wrap my head around all these things. That here I am, one of billions of people here on this Earth in this weird but incredible human body, feeling the cold of the wind and looking out at the world through this crazy things called eyes. What an experience this place really is. How crazy is life that I should be here in this moment. That I should be here at all.

So although I could probably continue on and on, needless to say I’m in a place where I’m feeling incredibly thankful. Overwhelmingly so. And I think the only appropriate way to wrap this up was with some of my favorite song lyrics from the song “10,000 Reasons” by Matt Redman because it was my favorite one I listened to on the beach. And let’s face it—I am very fortunate to have already experienced that many, if not more, examples in my life of how I’ve been so incredibly blessed. And I’m just excited to see how many more reasons  I continue to find in the months ahead here in France and in wherever direction He takes me.

“Your rich in love and you’re slow to anger,

Your name is great, and your heart is kind.

For all your goodness I will keep on singing,

10,000 reasons for my heart to find…

Bless the Lord, oh my soul,

Oh, my soul.

Worship His holy name.

Sing like never before,

Oh, my soul.

I’ll worship you’re holy name.”

-10,000 Reasons by Matt Redman